7 VR Terms Parents Need to Know

With the rising popularity of VR headsets kids today are entering a “Virtual world” known only to their eyes. How can parents keep them safe from the dangers of VR? The first step is to learn the lingo. Here are 7 VR terms every parent needs to know.


     #1  VR (Virtual Reality):

Virtual Reality. This one’s an easy one but a necessary place to start. When a user puts on a VR headset they enter “Virtual Reality”, a game world that is only meant to be accessed via a VR (Virtual Reality) Headset.  Although this is a place to play games do not dismiss VR as imaginary or childs play; Virtual Reality is very real and misunderstanding it can have serious consequences.

“Siri,” Dalevert’s voice was quavering, “If I die in Virtual Reality do I die in real life?” Siri’s loud silence silently filled Dalevert with quiet dread.

     #2  Varted:

When a user is wearing a VR headset and think that they smell a fart but can’t be sure if it’s in the game or if someone has broken into the house and is silently stealing all their stuff while farting. Usually when Varted a user is too absorbed into a game to realize the fart smell is occurring outside of VR and tries to investigate the odor in game. At other times a user may be too scared to remove their headset and find the reason for the smell.

“Dude I was deep into level 23 when I Varted but I couldn’t remember how to remove the headset so I just screamed and flailed around just in case anyone was in my house.”

#3  Eyenside:

A new term that denotes that a user is in VR. Compared to terms like Inside or Outside. A user that is wearing a VR headset and actively engaged in VR is “Eyenside”.

“So I was Eyenside the ice-volcano when suddenly I start tasting sand, I took my headset off just to be safe, but it turned out I was just Pterodactyling.

#4  Pterodactyling:

When a user becomes so absorbed in VR that they believe it is reality, they become the Pterodactyl. This is Pterodactyling.

“Oh man I totally broke into Jeff’s house while he was Eyenside and Varted him, but he was Pterodactyling so he just started searching for the smell in game.”


#5  Sandead:

When a user wears a VR headset they become unable to see or understand the “real” world around them. This has lead to a rise in VR related deaths, imagine you are a “Space Captain” and begin adjusting shields and engaging warp in-game while in “Reality” you’re spinning dials on your gas stove. The name for this kind of death was created thanks to the Playstation VR game which caused hundreds of youths to tragically die when a freak sandvalanche filled their basements with deadly non-breathable sand while they were Pterodactyling all over the Varting place.

“Dude Jeff totally Sandead himself while playing Mindcraft, He thought the laundry basket was a mine cart and he rode it down the stairs and into that giant hole in the floor he mined last week.”

#6  AR (Altered Reality):

Altered Reality Gaming or Post-Game Paradactyling refers to a condition in which “Real Life” is misidentified as “Virtual Reality”.  This dangerous condition usually occurs when a user Pterodactyls for too long and then is removed from VR. Reality seems to merge with the Virtual World and become gamified. Symptoms include marveling at how high the resolution or rendering distance is while walking around, complaining about missing inventory, failure to eat when hungry, inappropriately knocking over store displays or touching the faces of strangers, and complaining that traffic lights and queues are hidden loading screens.

“Wow,” Rongart marveled while rhythmically poking a sandwich artist with a fresh loaf of garlic-cardboard bread, “The resolution on this Subway sandwich shop is amazing!” Rongart began to climb onto the counter despite the lifelike sandwich artist protesting that he was not Eyenside.

“I’m going to see what the physics are like on the vegetable bar,” Rongart mumbled while he carelessly began jabbing and thrashing his arms in the direction of the assorted vegetables and cold cuts.

#7  VD (Virtually Dead):

A term that stands for Virtually Dead, when a user falls asleep while playing VR and thus is trapped in a game until it is beaten. They become unable to be awakened until the game is beaten and removing the headset is likely to cause instant death or permanent Post-Game Pterodactyling.

“Felice you can’t date Kirito he’s got VD so he’ll be trapped inside ‘Taco Bell Sports Resort!’ until at least next year,” Amysen giggled.
“Amysen, don’t bother reasoning with Felice she’s been PG Pterodactyling since her high score in American Fruit Ninja,” The Virtual Ghost of Jeff moaned.

Are you worried about your kids using VR? Do you want to stay informed?

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Author: News Reparter


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